"We have captured it! First circulating beam of 2009!" And with that tweet, researchers at CERN announced that they did in fact activate the Large Hadron Collider, after quite a long delay and despite warnings of a looming, nefarious Higgs boson. Whether or not we will have had total destruction as an unfortunate result of the device remains to be seen, but should the future find a way to either cease to exist or travel to the past in some time-bending paradox, we only hope linguists and physicists can work togeth